Week 63: September 8, 2014

Heeeeeey!

Guess where I'm at right now? That's right, Latvia! But different city. I was transferred to Imanta, which is an area in Riga. There's Riga Center (downtown Riga) and then there's Imanta (more residential area of Riga). It's beautiful. And big! At least compared to Daugavpils and Narva. Aaand a lot less Russian. I've said "Lab dien" more than I have "Privjet". 

But I loved it from the second I got here. A few factors went into that: 1. I'm serving with Sister Roy again! And it feels so good. 2. I'm in the same district as Sister Dalley and her new trainee, Sister Fackrell (not sure how to spell that). Being in the same district as two other sistersnever happens!!! 3. Imanta is so green and beautiful. 4. Being transferred at this point in my mission is much easier because it turns out that speaking and understanding pretty well makes all the difference in how comfortable you feel. 

Church on Sunday was so good. It was a testimony meeting and for the first time in my whole mission, it was a steady stream of the members getting up and bearing their testimonies. I had considered getting up and introducing myself, as is custom, but decided it could wait until next week. I'd already introduced myself to all of them beforehand. But it was such a powerful testimony meeting. The cool thing about this branch is that there are a few families that are members and there are like three returned missionaries! Families in the branch somehow connect everyone else and the whole thing feels like a family.

Plus, I was able to see my friend, Valerij! He's the first member I met in the Baltics because he helps the missionaries with their living permits here and he's a hoot. He's in our branch. He came up to me and said that my necklace was pretty. I tugged on his nice little vest and told him, "Right back at'cha." Love that guy.

The whole branch is so great. I realize that I've been using the same three adjectives for this whole email but there's just no other way of putting it. Imanta is lovely. We're opening up a new area so we've just been trying to get on our feet and organizing our apartment since I got here. We're so ready to work, though. Something about being with Sister Roy has made me realize that we don't have much time left and so there's no doubt in my mind that these next two transfers will be the best and most exhausting ones of my mission.

Saying goodbye to Daugavpils would have been really sad if I had time to do it. We had a day to pack and get our area ready for new sisters to come in. Anita, the new English student, asked us if we could go mushroom picking with her that night so we went! I've always wanted to go mushroom picking. We also picked berries while we were there, as you can see. It was so nice of her because she made a Lithuanian treat that I had mentioned that I loved and missed, so we had a picnic in the forest and then set out. It was hilarious because she told us that there's a type of bug that falls from the trees in the forest that, if it bites you, is deadly. So this solves the mystery, folks! This is why babushki wear scarves on their heads--so the bugs in the forest don't bite them. It's logical, kind of.

It was also incredibly entertaining watching Sister Clark walk through the forest with the basket of food. Literally every thirty seconds she'd scream and fling the basket because she ran into a spider web. So funny. Anita said that's how you can tell that you're in a good spot for picking mushrooms; if there are tons of spider webs then that means that people haven't been there before you.

I don't blame Sister Clark for freaking out though. The spiders were huge. 

I feel like I've been exposed to the prettiest parts of Latvia in the past week.

Saying goodbye to Inna was the saddest thing, besides the fact that I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to the members. We had a good lesson with her about why she needs the gift of the Holy Ghost and then we broke the news that both of us were leaving the following day. She took it really well, though. When she asked how old the new sisters would be, I told her 19 and 20. She got all dramatic in her Inna way and started flipping through the Book of Mormon, saying, "So it is true, then. The babes will teach the old people." Cracked me up. She's going to be fine in the trusted hands of Sister Coombs and her new trainee. 

I've learned so much in the past two transfers. I was thinking about a few of the lessons that stuck out to me the most, and one of them is that I've come to understand the importance of trying to understand other people.

Obviously with each companion, there are a variety of challenges and we have a different way of thinking, but what I've been blessed to learn is that no matter how different or foreign somebody else's way of thinking is to you, the Lord can give you an understanding of their hearts.

Of course, understanding other people starts with self-understanding. You can't understand someone better than you understand yourself. That's why when you meet someone who is easily annoyed or thinks that all of their ex's are crazy, it's clear that they don't know how to relate to other people and, chances are, they're one prideful son of a gun. Being unable to relate to others shows an inability to look outside one's self and to humbly accept that you aren't an authority on knowing all things that are worthwhile.

I'm pretty convinced that we're capable of relating to anybody, so it's not like it's an impossible task. We all have multitudes inside of us; conflicting parts of our tastes or random connections that we can make. Generally, the only thing keeping us from making those connections is just our pride because we don't want to have anything in common with someone that we classify as disagreeable.

So, stating it in an obvious way, if you ever feel like someone is illogical or not understandable, it's because you don't understand them. Rather than being okay with our judgments, we all have the option of looking again...and again and again, or as many times as it takes to see their heart in the way that God sees it. We are all blessed with access to gifts of the Spirit if we seek them, and that includes the gift of discernment. All gifts are given from God to enable us to magnify and multiply the beauty that He has already created; to glorify the works of His hands. By not being able to see your own gifts or the gifts of others and by misunderstanding them, we significantly restrict the possibilities of beauty and enrichment that comes from those gifts. By being narrow-minded, we limit the richness of meaning in our lives. 

As it says in the thirteenth article of faith, we seek after everything that is virtuous, lovely, of good report, or praiseworthy. That's not just in books; that's in people. And if we don't see it at first, then it's our duty to find it. Once we find it, then it comes naturally for us to share it. When we share it, the beauty is multiplied and a new depth comes into our relationships and interactions with others.

It's a cycle: understanding generally begets understanding, and the only direction that your relationship with somebody can spiral is upwards when both parties are seeking (against all odds or likeliness) a mutual understanding and are unwilling to settle for thinking of each other by their first, second, third, or fiftieth impressions. 

I'm so grateful for your prayers and any other form of support that you give me. I love you all to the moon and back.

Love,

Sister Gooch

Week 62: September 1, 2014

What's up?

So, the pictures, before I forget: I decorated my planner with the ancestors of the branch! Haha there were leftover copies of family pictures from the activity a few months ago so I figured I'd commemorate some of them by putting them on my planner. I halfway hope that I'll be transferred just so there's never that awkward moment when a member of the branch realizes that I have a picture of their grandma...and as a side note, I always have ink on my left hand because I'm a southpaw! Which is what the title of this email means.

The other picture is of the pancake/biscuit things that the Chibatarjovi made for us! Sister Chibatarjova is determined to send me home with a suitcase full of them. But how cute! Mushrooms. They also had squirrel-shaped ones, which I knew Denise would love.

It's been a great week. Can't believe that we find out transfers tomorrow! Everyone has been asking me where I think I'm going to be transferred because I've already been here for six months but honestly, I don't feel like I'm leaving. That could be attributed to the fact that I don't want to, haha. But I mean, wherever I'm asked to go is cool with me. There's not a city in the Baltics that I wouldn't want to serve in. I'll let you know next Monday. Maybe I'll be the first sister that they send back to Belarus O.o 

Psych. I wish. 

We went to the orphanage again to do another Pinewood Derby, but attempted to make it more organized because the last time was insane. I don't know how it worked out this way, but it was even crazier even though there were more chaperones and it was inside. Elder Allred and I sat at the end of the track trying to tell what places each car took but it was pretty much impossible because the kids would grab their cars off the track the second that they crossed the finish line. If nothing else, it was incredibly entertaining.

I gave up at the end and just sat next to a three-year old girl. She was the cutest thing ever. I said hi and asked what her name was and all I got in response was her slowly smiling at me. Her whole face blossomed like a little flower and I thought, "Oh my stars, she's adorable."

We had a new lady come to English this week and I just love her. She's like a Latvian version of Jess Viehweg (I still don't know how to spell that last name). She told me that I need to go to Barcelona (it's her favorite place in the world) and a few days later, she was like, "Have you bought the tickets yet?" Haha not quite...

On Saturday, we held a birthday party for Elder Farns and Janis, a member here. Unfortunately Janis didn't show up because he was drunk but it was a great gathering of members and investigators anyway. Elder Farns asked me to make a cake so I used the recipe from the cook book that you sent me. I'm sure it would have been a hit if we had normal flour instead of whole-wheat and weren't missing an entire cup of powdered sugar for the frosting -__- It was weirdly not sweet and the frosting was super buttery, so I told people that I was going for a more savory take on the birthday cake. Elder Farns made a beautiful chocolate cake but it's a good thing that Russians don't like their desserts quite as sugary because everyone asked me for the recipe! Take that, Elder Farns.

Haha if I sound bitter it's because he gave me a lot of crap for it. 

It was a really heart-felt dinner, though. The Russian tradition is to go around the table and share three wishes that you have for the birthday boy. Things like, "safety in all of your journeys, happiness in your choice of occupation, etc." and when it was Elder Jones' turn, he said, "Tomatoes, milk, and ground beef." Everyone got a good kick out of that. It's classic Elder Jones.

Church was pretty great, as well. Zhanna came again! She's just about the sweetest person on earth.

Inara and Adita (the Spalvens' daughter-in-law and granddaughter) came to the last part of sacrament meeting, too. Adita sat next to me and we played tic-tac-toe. They gave me their email so I can give them the cake recipe, but it also gives me a good excuse to keep in touch вообще. I love them both a lot.

And I'm sorry for the random Russian words. Typing the English word just makes the thought sound lamer and I generally can't think of what it would even be in English. I swear I'm not just doing it to be annoying.

Inna is doing pretty well. She's been extra busy with work but she was able to stay after English on Thursday and read a little from the Book of Mormon with us. "Won't you stay and discuss Mormon's Book with me?" It's so cool to watch her go now. She flips to where she's reading and every few verses she'll say, "Oi! This is exactly about me." I love it. She's a changed woman.

We went visiting teaching with Valentina to the Chibatarjovi (that's when they gave us those squirrel and mushroom pancake biscuit things) and Valentina was on a roll. We were reading in Romans 8 about the fact that we are children of God and Valentina got this real thoughtful look on her face and then stated, "God is from the tribe of Judah." I just love that, first of all, it's not only false but impossible. And secondly, it cracked me up because it had nothing to do with what we were reading.

One of the highlights of the lesson was Valentina telling them how cool I look when I garden. She literally uses the word for "cool" in Russian. She imitates me and does grunting noises as she pretends that she's stomping down on a shovel and I'm like, "Do I really grunt like that?" 

Love her and her admiration for my Idahoan origin.

Random facts about today: it's the first day of school and they really know how to celebrate it. Everyone and their dog has a bouquet of flowers and because we live by the school, it sounds like a kid is singing into a microphone karaoke style. Why don't we do that in America?

It's also Elder Hampton's last Monday (he goes home on Wednesday) so we're going to have a picnic in the cemetery! I've wanted this for so long. 

Hopefully I have cool pictures to send of it next week. I love you all!

Love,

Sister Gooch

P.S. If you see any typos, they're stylistic...

Week 61: August 25, 2014

Well, it looks like summer is over! It's been raining pretty consistently throughout the past week. I'm okay with that, though. I've been missing wearing scarves and being comfortable in layers.

Sadly, we said goodbye to Sister Kuznetsova on Wednesday morning. It was so fun having her here, and it's a little weird without her. Much quieter and less Russian; that's for sure. She promised me that the first thing she'd read when she got home was the Harry Potter series. The fool hasn't read or seen them yet!

We spent a lot of time with Valentina this week. First, it was stopping by Sister Chibatarjova in the hospital. She just had an operation on her mouth. Have I mentioned that the hospitals in the Baltics are sketchy as junk? The hallways are dark and most everything is painted concrete. On the bright side, the Daugavpils hospital is right across from the beach and forest, so it's got a nice location.

Valentina was telling us that thirty years ago, tons of people would come from Russia to the Latvian forests to pick berries and mushrooms. Those are huge here. You see babushki with red and purple-stained hands all the time from picking berries in the forest. I guess that people still do that but not as much as they used to.

We were also able to work on her garden. Do you remember like five months ago when I told you that I helped her plant potatoes? Well, I was lucky enough to be here long enough to dig them back up! We got to her garden and she told Sister Clark to start weeding, then pointed to me and said, "Gooch, you're going to dig up the potatoes with me." For some reason, she still has it in her head that I really know what I'm doing because I'm from Idaho. She was so pumped to share them, too--she sent us home with a gigantic bag full of them. If only I had Gram's recipe for pea and potato soup! *Hint, hint*

She said "Latvian potatoes are the best in the world," and I opened my mouth to disagree but then she gave me that Soviet look and I just kind of nodded. (I'm so sorry, Idaho!)

We definitely haven't been lacking in miracles this week. First of all, Elder Allred joined our district! Do you remember him? He and I served together in Narva and I just love his guts. So that was a pleasant surprise because it's not the transfer until next week.

Second and most important, Inna has had the coolest change of heart! She hadn't wanted to meet with us because she felt like it was pointless if she wasn't going to ever pay tithing. We had her stay after English the other day and just planned on talking to her about a change of heart. What ended up happening was kind of cool. We told her how we've had to experience a change of heart recently--learning how to get along. We were pretty honest in how we've had a hard time working together from the beginning and how it definitely hasn't come naturally to love one another. She was shocked, haha. She literally thinks that we're perfect, which is ludicrous. The Spirit was really strong though because we talked about the things that each of us have been doing individually to make it work (things that we didn't know the other person was doing) and testified about the fact that the Lord is always ready to shape our hearts if we let Him. 

From there, she decided that she wanted to keep meeting with us and continue trying to let her faith grow.

She called me when I was working on Valentina's garden and said, "Sister Gooch, I woke up at midnight last night and read the Mormon's Book. Won't you come by tonight and discuss it with me?" She was in a particularly polite mood all day, so when we got to her place at 8 that night, I had no idea what we were in for. Our lesson plan was literally to listen to her talk and respond as the Spirit directed. 

We started with a prayer and then she told us what happened the night before. She said that she had woken up at midnight and instead of reaching for a cigarette, she grabbed the Book of Mormon and started reading because she felt like she really needed to. She said, "I even forgot that this book is supposed to annoy me!" She started in Ether 6 and read all the way to the end. And what's more: she understood and enjoyed it! In her words, "I had Holy Ghost helping me to understand the text." 

The fun doesn't end there, folks. Apparently when she woke up, she still felt the influence of the Spirit and wanted to do something about it. So she literally called her enemies and made peace with them; every single one. That's repentance, my friends! 

It was cool to point out to her how much more Christlike she has become since meeting with us. She said herself that the faith that she's gained recently is something that she wants to keep forever, and then she said that she would be satisfied if that's all the Lord gave her was just a tiny seed. 

You know what, though? That's so much less than what she's capable of. Heavenly Father isn't going to be satisfied with her only having a little bit of His power in her life when she was meant to have it all, в конце концов. 

I feel like that's one of our biggest temptations in this life: to settle when things are good. I know I've said it before but it's something that the Lord is really searing into my heart. Settling goes against the very nature of our spirits. We were created with a purpose to propel us forward and upward and outward, which purpose Satan so cunningly curbs. 

Imagine what kind of a person you could become if you did not let anything or anyone distract you from your purpose: to perfect your gifts, strengths, talents, weaknesses, and imperfections through the Atonement of Jesus Christ.

How much more you would you be?

I love you all a lot and I'm so grateful for your prayers. Have a good week!

С любовью,

Сестра Гуч

P.S. I've had Christmas music stuck in my head all week. Wish I could sing it just to annoy J-Beezy.

Week 60:August 18, 2014

Mother of pearl, I think this past week might have been the happiest of my life.

It's weird, too, because it's not because Inna has suddenly started doing really well or that anything has been easier. I think it started with Tuesday's district meeting.

Elder Hampton taught about how we should treat other people, and it correlated perfectly with all of the stuff that I learned a few months earlier about how to help somebody change. He talked about how to become the kind of person that enables other people to be their best selves and reach their potential, and how becoming that kind of person has everything to do with becoming like Christ.

It's funny that I'm always surprised to rediscover again and again that just because Christ lived a perfect life didn't mean that he wasn't relatable or that He held people at a distance because they weren't worthy to be in His presence. His influence was one that pulled others close and taught them without hypocrisy or fear that the love he extended wouldn't be returned. 

Learning about that kind of love has been the most liberating thing about my mission. It's been an especially powerful lesson that I've learned in the past two weeks. 

I hadn't realized it, but over my mission I had come to value being professional and doing things the right way a little more than I should have. Especially training someone! Every little thing that was done incorrectly would stress me out because I felt like being a good trainer meant that I would teach her all of the rules and how to follow them with exactness. I would always think, "What would (insert good missionary's name here) do? How would they react?" and then I'd try to react that way. Which is so dumb! That district meeting made me realize that the only thing I need to worry about is making sure that patience is a part of my character; that my first reaction is to mirror what Christ would have me do and not worry about correcting someone in the way that I think another missionary would expect them to be corrected. Once again, I don't have the words to express the heart of what I'm learning but I hope you can get an idea of what I'm trying to explain.

Elder Hampton used a really cool quote by David O. Mckay, though. 

He said, "Every person who lives in this world wields an influence, whether for good or for evil. It is not what he says alone, it is not alone what he does. It is what he is. Every man, every person radiates what he or she is. Every person is a recipient of radiation. The Savior was conscious of that. Whenever he came into the presence of an individual, he sensed that radiation—whether it was the woman of Samaria with her past life; whether it was the woman who was to be stoned or the men who were to stone her; whether it was the statesman, Nicodemus, or one of the lepers. He was conscious of the radiation from the individual. And to a degree so are you, and so am I. It is what we are and what we radiate that affects the people around us. As individuals, we must think nobler thoughts. We must not encourage vile thoughts or low aspirations. We shall radiate them if we do. If we think noble thoughts, if we encourage and cherish noble aspirations, there will be that radiation when we meet people, especially when we associate with them. The effect of our words and acts is tremendous in this world. Every moment of life you are changing to a degree the lives of the whole world. … So, it’s not the surroundings, it isn’t the positions; the thing that will influence [others] in this world, are personalities. No matter what you are people will feel and recognize this. You radiate, you can’t hide it. You may pretend something else, but that will not affect people. It is important … that we seek, both in life and in books, the companionship of the best and noblest men and women. [Thomas] Carlyle, a great English writer, says that “Great men taken up in any way are profitable company. We cannot look, however imperfectly, upon a great man, without gaining something by him. He is the living ‘light-fountain,’ which it is good and pleasant to be near. If you will study the lives of these great “light-fountains” of the world, you will learn of at least one thing that has made their names endure. It is this: Each one has given something of his life to make the world better. They did not spend all their time seeking only pleasure and ease, and a “good time” for themselves alone, but found their greatest joy in making others happy and more comfortable. All such good deeds live forever, even though the world may never hear of them. No good deed, no kind word can be spoken without its effect being felt for good upon all. Sometimes the good may be infinitesimal, but as a rock that is thrown in a pool starts a wave from the center which continues to enlarge until every part of the shore is touched, so your deeds, silent, many of them, unknown, unspoken, unheralded, continue to radiate and touch many hearts."

We were then asked, what are you radiating? What are the three qualities that you most want to radiate in your life? Then Elder Hampton promised us that if we take those qualities to the Lord in prayer, He will guide us in a practical and logical way as to how we can make them a part of us.

The same promise applies to you!

It's been amazing to me how simple it is to do that, and how much it's changed my attitude. It's suddenly so much easier for me to care about other people in the way that they need it, to find the good in places where it isn't immediately visible, and to make other people feel comfortable with themselves.

I feel like learning how to help others change is like learning how to flip on a light inside of yourself. It's cheesy, but I honestly feel radiant lately. Radiant in the sense that I feel like I'm learning how to love people in such a way that they can recognize the light in themselves. Marianne Williamson said it perfectly: 

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” 

So yeah, this week was mostly wonderful because I'm feeling brighter and just happy in general.

We had our movie night that we've been planning for a month now and it went so well! Honestly, it couldn't have been more perfect. The picture that I attached may not look like much, but it took so much work! A few miracles went into it: 1. We found vinyl to make the stars out of. Second time that being an expert with vinyl has come in handy on my mission! I felt so at home standing in the store with all those rolls of different colors of vinyl and sticking the final product on the wall. (Mattie, remember the squirrels that we used to save?) So happy. 2. We found a red velvet curtain! 3. The elders were able to make partitioners (the things with red rope that make it clear that you're standing in a line at the movie theater). 4. We made legitimate movie tickets online. 5. We made our own popcorn bags that were adorable. 6. We cut out big stars and every person who attended got to write their name on it like a celebrity and then stick it on the wall. 7. We were able to darken all of the windows with sheets so it was actually dark while we watched the movie. 8. We finished decorating right as people started to show up. 9. We were able to make brownies and cookies aaaand provide beverages. 10. We moved in a couch and the whole atmosphere was just like a movie theater! I don't know if you realize how hard it is to make a sacrament hall feel like a movie theater. It was quite the accomplishment.

Zhana (the less-active I've been focusing on working with) came as well! And a bunch of investigators. It was a much-needed opportunity to strengthen relationships with less-actives, investigators, and members. President Spalvens told us we should do it every Saturday, he loved it so much. 

And as a perk, we got to watch Frozen! IN RUSSIAN! That movie is adorable, and I think that the fact that it was in Russian made it a million times more enjoyable. So cool that I can watch movies in Russian and understand it!

We all took pictures together afterwards and it was another surreal moment where I thought to myself, "There's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be." 

I love Daugavpils.

Another cool thing about this week was that the Spalvens introduced us to their daughter-in-law, Inara. She's here with her daughter on vacation until September 1st and she wanted me to help her with English. (Turns out that when you tell members that you're an English major, that automatically means you're the go-to person whenever somebody needs help with English...which is something that I can totally live with.) For some reason, Inara and I immediately clicked. Teaching her is really cool because she has been taught by the missionaries off and on for two years and so she already knows a lot about the gospel. She is a very contemplative person and a logical thinker, so the gospel and faith in general doesn't make much sense to her.

As I was teaching her, something came out of my mouth that I hadn't realized but that is totally true!

When you're first studying the gospel (or even when you've been in the church for a long time but haven't put a concerted effort into learning truth), faith and God kind of seem like an abstract concept. It seems like a bunch of random things thrown together and called the gospel because we couldn't think of anything more specific to call it.

But what's miraculous is the more that you study it and the more effort you put into understanding the basic truths of the gospel that are contained in the scriptures and in the words of modern-day prophets, the more logical everything becomes. You realize that each truth is not only connected, but that each truth is dependent on another truth, and in that way they support each other and can't be separated. I told Inara that the more I study it, the more I realize that it has to be true and that it's the only thing in the world that makes perfect logical sense to me, and how I know that God can teach her specifically and individually and in a way that will make sense to her.

I love teaching. I'm not the best at it but there is nothing that feels better than saying something that makes a light bulb go off for someone else.

Good news about Inna, as well! We had a lesson with her and Sister Spalvena helped. She re-explained tithing and it was received much more kindly, haha. Inna understands it but doesn't think she has the faith to live by it. We're working on getting her to recognize the steps of faith that she has already made and then how she can use the Atonement to let her faith grow.

Another miracle was that we were finally able to meet with Zhana! That's one of the biggest miracles of them all because she has been avoiding meeting with missionaries since 2011. Literally, it was the first time that she's showed up to a meeting in three years. So cool! She agreed to meet weekly and come to church every week. Man, I love her.

So many things made me laugh this week. Real quick, I'll tell you about a phone call I had with Ruslan, a less active. I called him to invite him to movie night. He usually doesn't answer the phone and has been inactive since about May. But anyway, he must have been drunk because he answered the phone and after I explained to him about the movie night, he asked what movie we'd be watching. I told him Frozen and he was like, "You know what movie is better? A Walk to Remember. I adore that movie. That girl got cancer and that guy totally changed his life because he loved her. What a cool movie! So awesome. If you were watching A Walk to Remember, I'd be there in a heartbeat." He literally gushed about it for five minutes straight. Cracked me up.

Another thing was that Elder Saviola turned to me during district language study and said, "Sister Gooch, your spirit animal is most definitely an otter. They are an extremely intelligent creature and they fall asleep on their backs holding hands. That's just something that I can see you doing." Haha loved that analysis. 

Anyway, I'm out of time but I love you all! Also wanted to say good luck moving into the new house and thank you times a billion for doing it while I'm not there, haha.

Love,

Sister Gooch

P.S. The picture is of with me, Elder Hampton, and Sasha. Awkward butt sticking out, I know. I decided to own it instead of deleting it though. WERKIN IT.

Week 59: August 11, 2014

What a week!

It seems like time is just flying by. The other night it started thundering and raining harder than I even knew it was possible. We were walking home from the church and Sister Clark and I looked at each other and were like, "Eh, let's embrace this." We folded up our umbrellas and skipped home through the torrential storm. It was one of the funniest memories on my mission so far because Sister Kuznetsova was trying to keep up behind us while screaming, "You're acting so American right now!" It literally felt like I was swimming through the air, the rain was so thick. I'm glad we took advantage of it. The picture attached is what the street looked like afterwards. I took a video but you'll have to wait a few more months to see that.

We had exchanges here in Daugavpils with Sister Ixtlahuac and Sister Scheiss from Riga. I went with Sister Ixt for the day and man, I just want to be friends with her for the rest of my life. She is an all-star and one of the most poised people I've met. What I really like about exchanges with her is that she is not only a good listener, but she asks the right questions to help me realize what I can work on without her even suggesting it. It's magic. I've been blessed to have the best sister training leaders that this mission (world) has to offer.

It's also been cool to see how much she's grown since her first transfer. She's a lot better at spotting drunk people :)

Sister Scheiss is from Las Vegas and came to the Baltics at the same time as Sister Ixtlahuac. She's the happiest person I've met. I know I've always said that babushki are the sunshine of the Baltics, but Sister Scheiss gives them a run for their money. She also went to BYU before the mission and when I told her where I was from, she started naming off the people she knows from Eagle. We both screamed and fan girled over Jacob Alderman and how much we both love him. (Where is that kid nowadays, anyway? If your last name ends with Alderman and you're reading this, then UPDATE ME ON YOUR LIFE!!!) So that was a fun bonding experience.

Something awesome about this week was going to the orphanage just outside of Dpils to do a Pinewood Derby. It was madness, as you can imagine. So much fun and really hilarious because the kids were essentially impossible to control enough to actually do races. They didn't get to carve their cars but they just drew on blocks of wood with markers and then we put wheels on them. They all called us their aunts and uncles. So cute.

We focused a lot on getting in contact with less-actives this week, too. Huge miracle was that on Sunday, there were four of them at church! And most importantly, that one of them was Zhana, a less-active member that I've been trying to meet with ever since March. She is super nice but I didn't know much about her so I haven't know what we can do to help her. When she came to church on Sunday, she agreed to meet regularly to get ready to receive her patriarchal blessing and go to the temple and all that good stuff! It was so nice to finally get to know her and what she needs. 

Sitting in church on Sunday, I just got this overwhelming feeling of how love for everything that surrounds me right now. I so often forget that I'm not going to be here for very much longer and it kind of hit me how lovely these people are and how lucky I am to know them. 

We taught Inna a few times this week and when Sister Ixt was here, we taught her about tithing. That was a really difficult lesson. I've never felt the Spirit so strongly and consistently on a lesson before because tithing is something that both Sister Ixtlahuac and I have really powerful experiences with. Unfortunately, Inna's heart wasn't ready to accept it. She viewed it like it's a gym membership or something, where you only get the blessings if you pay for them. That's obviously not what it is.

I've reflected on the lessons that I've learned from while I've served here for the past five months, and especially what I've learned from the process of teaching Inna. From the beginning, she's told me that the Atonement sounds so abstract and she can't understand how something that somebody did thousands of years ago could have any impact on her life today. Then after talking about this subject a little more with Elder Hampton, I've gained the most valuable insight about the Atonement. I've always imagined it as the power that we can access after we've decided to repent and felt true sorrow. Like the Atonement is the last stop in the whole process. After reading D&C 88 (especially verses 6-13 and 40-50) it was like my mind was opened up and I realized that the power of Jesus Christ's Atonement is everywhere. It's in the works long before we even realize that we need to start the process of changing because its power influences every single aspect of life. I can't explain it in the way that I understand it, but I really want you to read those verses and ponder why the power of the Atonement isn't abstract. I'd loooove to hear your insights. Hopefully I can write my thoughts down and share them with you more concretely next week. But I know that the more we use the Atonement in our lives, the more we realize that it's in the details of everything that surrounds us. 

I love you all so much. Have fun hanging out with my best friends and OH MY GOSH MATTIE DON'T FORGET TO WRITE ME.

Have a good week! 

С любовью,

Сестра Гуч

p.s. I think one of the pics is of me holding a cup saying "I left my <3 in Narva". I forgot to tell you that S. Dalley made me one and sent it to me when she was still in Narva! Priceless. I adore it. 

Week 57: July 28, 2014

Hey, good news! I finally got the Christmas package from Jared and Emily. Apparently it was just hanging out in Tallinn for a while after I got transferred out of Estonia. But woo hoo! I will most definitely be saving the scarf and socks for November :) I got to share the Idaho spuds with Sister Kuznetsova and she loved it.

Which brings me to my next piece of news--transfers happened and Sister Clark and I got a third companion. It's Kcenia Kuznetsova from Narva! She's here on a mini-mission for four weeks. We went to Riga to pick her up and because Sister Clark had a visa appointment. As always, it was an adventure getting back to Daugavpils. Sister Kuznetsova's camera was stolen and we missed our bus so we took a train instead.

It's been so fun to get an update on all of the people that I love in Narva. It's also been awesome to speak Russian all day, everyday, and to see that I'm actually capable of it. I told Sister Kuznetsova to correct every single mistake I make and she's already pointed out a bunch of little ones that I've been making my whole mission. Sheesh, that's embarrassing.

It's been great though. Sister Kuznetsova cracks me up every time she does her Estonian accent in Russian. I laugh for dayyyyss. They really do speak Russian so oddly.

We had two Member-Missionary Night Outs: one with Valentina and another with Lidija. We basically just went visiting teaching with Valentina and discussed/planned how to make this testimony book. Both were great and the plus side to going with Valentina was that she gave us a fresh jar of honey! Score.

As for Inna, she's stopped progressing and she's clinging to any excuse she can to not change. But I still have hope! I was quite blunt in our lesson with her the other day. After telling her that what she is doing every day (praying for forgiveness for doing the same thing over and over again without any intent to change) is not repentance at all, she said, "I have worldly sorrow, don't I?" We said yes, but emphasized that God can change the desires of our hearts if that's what we really want.

I asked her if she's ready to stop feeling sorry for herself and start making the small daily changes to repent.

She said no.

That basic lack of desire to change worries me a little (a lot), but I just don't feel like I've done everything in my power yet. So the fight's not over until the fat lady sings...or something like that. I don't have the brain power to remember what we say in English because it is so hot here.

Anyways, I received some really cool revelation for our next lesson with her. I'm studying the Book of Mormon and looking for the gospel of Jesus Christ, and something that I'd never thought of came to mind as I was practice teaching with Sister Clark. After reading the first two chapters of the Book of Mormon, I was thinking how Nephi knew what God wanted him to do. He knew that he needed to leave Jerusalem and he knew that keeping the commandments was important. Laman and Lemuel also knew the difference between right and wrong. I mean, their dad was a prophet. They were probably taught the gospel pretty thoroughly, if not side by side with Nephi. But what was the difference between Nephi and his two older brothers? It surprised me to realize that it was the simple act of prayer that made all the difference. Nephi poured his heart out to God and asked for Him to give him understanding and direction. He didn't just want to know about the commandments or why they were given; he wanted the ability to follow them and to do it for the right reasons. Laman and Lemuel knew the facts in their head but they didn't let it hit their hearts. They went through all of the same crap (even less) that Nephi did but were more put out and inconvenienced by it. 

It's the same thing with us. If a commandment really annoys us or if we feel like it's more of a burden than a blessing, then it's up to us to pull on our grown-up pants and pray like Nephi did for God to help us make the connection between an understanding of the mind and an understanding of the heart.

We can all be so spiritually lazy and spend years being vaguely discontent with a certain commandment or principle without putting in the work to pray and ask to be at peace with it. 

I stress that we don't need to knit-pick our testimonies with a magnifying glass of criticism, but that we take a faithful approach and give the Lord and His church the benefit of the doubt. If you don't get why the Lord has certain opinions or asks certain things of us, then that's more than understandable. He thinks on a totally different dimension than we're capable of right now. What's important to know is that He can give us the understanding in our mind and hearts that we need in this life to live with peace of conscience and true happiness. 

Anyways, I've been trying to stop being lazy myself and to root out the parts of my character or principles about the gospel that I don't understand and that have always vaguely bothered me. It's been humbling and, well, I'm still in the process. Probably will be for the rest of my life. But the point is that I'm not planning on settling for anything less than absolute peace with how I understand the gospel and how I live it.

I love you all and hope that you're enjoying your swimming pools, drinks with ice, and air conditioning, ya filthies...

С любовью,

Сестра Гучка

P.S. Learning so much Russian slang! But don't worry, it's not to be used until after the mission :)

Week 56: July 21, 2014

It's been one of those weeks that have prompted me to look around and ask myself, "Is this really happening?" 

Starting with Tuesday night. Our carbon monoxide alarm went off at 10:20, but it was only because it was out of batteries. I wasn't worried about it but S. Clark was convinced that we were going to die, so she wrapped a scarf around her mouth and nose (still not sure what function that served) and called our district leader. He called our zone leaders, who called President Harding. Right as I was about to turn off the light and get into bed, E. Clark (zone leader) called and said that we needed to find someplace else to stay for the night. Our options were to kick the Center elders our of their apartment or stay at the church. We chose the church.

It was 11 by the time that we got there and I was feeling bitter, haha. We locked the door behind us and set the alarm, then went into the sacrament hall and made our beds on the floor.Ten minutes later, we heard the alarm go off, so we ran downstairs and tried to reset it one more time. It went off again. We punched in the code and figured that we'd be fine without the alarm set. 

We went back upstairs and I joked to S. Clark that the cops were probably going to show up, and by now I'm starting to realize that whatever I joke about generally ends up happening.

I was way too paranoid to even lay down for a while because I had thought that I'd heard a siren outside. I just sat on the floor, hugging my legs and watching the windows. After a few minutes of that, I was pretty sure that searchlights were being pointed at the windows. S. Clark's reaction was to get down as close to the ground as she could, whereas mine was to try to make it very obvious that we were just little babies so they wouldn't shoot us. Very telling moment of who's from Idaho and who's from Vegas. 

Nothing really happened for the next 15 minutes, so we just went to bed. I mean, roughly speaking. I was lying on the ground and waiting for the cops to bust open the door and sic their dog on me. 

I'm using the lateness of the evening to excuse my dramatics, by the way.

As I was lying there, I felt vibrations on the ground like footsteps. I shot up and asked S. Clark if she could hear it. She crawled over to me (still convinced that if she stood up, she'd be shot), pointed at the door and said, "Somebody turned on the hall light." 

In retrospect, my reaction wasn't 100% logical but I turned on the lights, threw open the door and called, "Allo?" That's the Russian way of saying hello, if it wasn't already clear. Right in front of me was a terrified looking President Spalvens (branch president) and a police officer. 

We told him what we were doing there and thankfully he wasn't upset at all for the lateness of the hour.

Long story not so short, we didn't get much sleep that night. It was definitely something I'll never forget. 

And no, there was never a problem with our carbon monoxide levels. (Insert eye twitch here.)

Something really exciting for us this week was the launching of our "Night with the Missionaries" program. We made a calendar and got some people to sign up, but basically what it is is an opportunity for members to do missionary work their way with our assistance. As missionaries, we always try to get members to come to lessons with investigators, which is called a "member-present". But this is the opposite...it's kind of like a "missionary-present" night for them. They get to choose what we do, where we go, and what we teach. They can be creative with it, too: we could bake something for a less-active and drop it off, have a party (in the most mild sense of the word, haha) with their friends that they want to introduce to the gospel, and a million other things. Lidija's idea is awesome: she wants to make a "How to Bear Your Testimony" book full of ways that will help members realize that bearing your testimony doesn't have to be at the pulpit and it doesn't have to start with the formal, "I know...".

We also held the Pinewood Derby on Saturday. The worm didn't end up looking too bad, but he's mostly like a show-horse in the sense that he's got all the beauty without the speed. 5th place, my friends. Elder Hampton dubbed it "The Little Worm That Almost Could". Ouch.

The good news is that Inna came and, because she didn't make a car, I gave her someone's who didn't show up. Of course, she ended up taking first place. She said, "I woke up and knew something lucky was going to happen today." 

President and Sister Harding were there and acted as our judges. Afterwards, S. Harding went with us to Inna's and we taught her. We had planned on teaching her about prophets but it didn't feel right so we ended up talking about God's love and the Book of Mormon. Cool fact: it was Sister Harding's first time on a lesson with the missionaries in the Baltics. Woo hoo! She is an amazing teacher. She listened and applied pure doctrine to Inna's situation so well without getting distracted by little things that tend to distract me. 

We had taught Inna the Word of Wisdom earlier in the week and it was definitely not received favorably. She said that it was "laughable" that we don't drink coffee and had about a million different excuses as to why she needs it. We never argued with those, but consistently pointed her back to the fact that if we love God, then we obey His commandments. Also stressed that she needed to ask God if it's really what He expects of her and she immediately said, "I know this is true, but why does God want me to be miserable?" Haha she needed some time to think and pray about it. When we met again, she said that God gave her an idea that in order to quit smoking, she needed to plan out every situation when she would feel the desire to smoke and then decide how she'd react beforehand. Чудо!

I've spent a lot of time thinking about Inna's concerns and I had the idea to write down all of my excuses that I could possibly have for being disobedient. Then, after pondering that list, I wrote down all of the excuses I could think of that Christ would have had to be disobedient.

Let me tell you, they were better excuses than mine.

The fact is that we can all find a million and one different reasons why we don't need to be obedient to the commandments, but it takes a person with true integrity of character to value the one most compelling reason to forget all of those: a deep and abiding love of God and desire to be like Him. 

On Sunday, President Harding asked me to give a talk right before sacrament about the Holy Ghost. What impression came to mind was to speak on the power that the Holy Ghost has to change the very desires of our hearts when we rely upon the Atonement. 

If you don't feel that your love for God is deep enough or if you don't have a natural desire to be obedient, pray for one. That is a gift that Heavenly Father is more than ready to give to you if you're willing to work for it. That is a trait that must be a part of your soul if you plan on having any kind of lasting peace in your life.

I love you. Thanks so much for your prayers and support. I'm pretty sure I've spent my whole life surrounded with some of the best people this world has to offer. 

So who's the luckiest girl on the planet? THIS ONE.

(Ugh. So cheesy. Sorry.)

Love,

Sister Gooch

P.S. Sorry the pictures are so crappy...the elders took it for me real quick :) DAS MY WORM!