I feel like so much has happened in the past week. We picked up the sisters from the Rostov, Russia mission and they've been with us for the past two days. They're waiting on visa work so we're not exactly sure when they're leaving. It's been fun, though! And stressful. Mostly stressful, haha. Daugavpils is pretty small so it's kind of crazy trying to plan each night and make sure that we're all being effective. They're really nice and laid back though. Their names are Sister Haas and Sister Cook. They keep telling us how beautiful Latvia is compared to Rostov, so I have a renewed appreciation for the Baltics. It really is pretty here.
Sadly, Zita leaves for England today. She'll be staying there until August, but she said she'd like to do lessons over Skype, so we're excited about that. The hope is that we can pass her off to the missionaries in Isle of Mann (that's where she'll be) or something so she can actually meet with them in person. I've never taught over Skype but I'll let you know how that goes. We'll miss her: she's one of the sweetest people ever.
Art club has been going alright. We decided to combine it with English class and teach an English art class because not many people came for just the art club. It would be cheaper to advertise for and less stress on me to teach everything 100% in Russian, so we're going to start it back up in a few weeks. It's cool though because I feel like my art skills have improved a lot just from teaching it.
We've been able to do a lot of service though! It's been some of my favorite days on my mission. We helped Valentina garden, and then she asked her neighbors if they had planted yet and they said no so we went and gardened for her two neighbors. It's hilarious to help Valentina because she is the most manly babushka I have ever met. She's super strong and has this weird dog whispering ability. There are tons of big dogs here (especially at the dachas, or summer home things) and every time she opens her mouth to yell at them, they immediately listen. Humans do the same for her, especially when she's telling you what you're doing wrong with the plow. It's funny though because for some reason she really thinks I know what I'm doing. She came up to me in church the other day and was like, "Sister Gooch, I just wanted to tell you that it was so cool how you were shoveling that dirt the other day. You just (insert grunt and impersonation of me stomping on a shovel to get it further into the dirt)! Ha-ha-ha! Hee-hee-hee!" That's a direct quote, haha. She grunts a lot in a very Russian way. Maybe Jared can explain it to you. Anyway, she taught me how to plow and we planted potatoes. How fitting is that? It was really fun and I am quite sore because of it. We're going back on Tuesday, so I'll be sure to take a picture of how picturesque her neighbor's garden is. I love days like that.
As a side note, I finally bought a bible in Russian! Sister Roy and I have been struggling along for the past two transfers because neither of us had one but we found a book store and the one I bought looks sweet. I might send you a picture later today because we're splitting our email time.
So I've had a surprising discovery in the past few days. I've been pondering a lot about what it takes to help a person change, because that's essentially my purpose here in the Baltics. Whether it's my investigators, members, or companion, I'm supposed to be helping them improve. So in praying about it, I've come to a realization. Are you ready? Here comes the boom:
Who you are and what you do matters a lot more than who the other person is and what they do.
So often we see room for improvement in a loved one and we wish they'd somehow change or we just tell ourselves to stop being judgmental. I want to emphasize the difference between being judgmental and being too easily satisfied. I read a quote by C.S. Lewis that says, "It would seem that our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at sea. We are far too easily pleased." And, in the same sense, we can settle for less than we deserve and are capable of if we are going to hid behind the mask of tolerance rather than rolling up our sleeves and rooting out the things that make us ungodly, including helping others do the same. I am not suggesting that we make mountains out of molehills and begin to attack at every visible weakness we can discern. Rather, I'm saying that we should determine to become enablers of change.
There are a few essentials to becoming such a person. First and foremost, it requires loving like Christ does. Being accepting as He is means realizing that the faults and imperfections of another person (and, by extension, yours) are temporary and must be treated as such. If you always think of them in the same light with the same old shadows, it makes them feel incapable of change and has a paralyzing effect on relationships. Christ helps people form new, fresh views of themselves. We need to make the necessary changes in our hearts to do the same.
It also requires listening to their concerns if they have them (you can assume that they do, or they're probably not breathing) and don't try to solve them all at once. Just try to understand them and why they feel the way they feel. Chances are that their actions and character will make much more sense and you'll see past the surface imperfections to what they're actually struggling with. Before you even think about pointing out the flaws in their logic or giving them what seems to be an obvious solution, realize that you're treading on sacred ground. The guidance of the Spirit is the only thing that will assure that something worthwhile comes out of your mouth, and it's in these moments of clarity that you can have great impact on the person. When someone feels truly understood, then they are generally ready to listen to what you have to say.
Praying for the gift of discernment enables you to see their potential and point it out to them. Tell them of the things you could honestly see them accomplishing or open their eyes to their gifts and ways to further develop them. None of this will mean anything, however, if you're telling them things you wish they had. If your attitude and comments are not coming from a genuine place, then the effects will be the opposite of what's desired and trust will be lost.
In all things, be genuine. If you don't honestly believe it, then it's better not to say it. If you are genuine and seeking the Spirit's guidance, you will succeed in helping the person lift their eyes to the higher plane of eternal perspective. Don't expect change to manifest itself anytime soon, but be unwearied in your efforts to raise their sights because you are building them up to lay a foundation for the rest of their lives and their eternity. If we were dealing with light bulbs, then we could just reach up and tighten it a little to make it shine again, but we're dealing with eternal souls here and they require more diligence and love to make them shine the way they were designed to. The way that we love people in this life will effect the way that they view themselves and this world, and it'll effect generations beyond us. We must not become so easily pleased that our posture toward eternal life becomes slouched and noncommittal. We must not settle for lives lived half-heartedly. That's not what we're here for. We're not here to indulge in things that will ultimately leave us empty. We're here to seek out the truly precious and valuable things in this world. You have to have enough love for yourself and others to keep each other from settling, because we were made to be much, much more than just good people.
So an enabler, in essence, is someone who is a conduit of truth and shines it in such a way as to allow others to look to their example and learn how to shine for themselves. Light is infectious and because of our identity as children of the very Being who embodies light, the possibilities of spreading it are as infinite as the spirits inside us.
I really love you. I know that's easy to gloss over when you read it, but what I mean in that tiny phrase is that I love you perfectly (or as perfectly as an imperfect person is capable of loving) for the person that you are. I love you for all of the things that I've learned from watching you and for all the times that you've talked to me and for being funny and for teaching me how to laugh at myself and for loving me back. You're the very best people I know, and I take you with me everywhere I go. Mostly because I have lots of Mom quotes in the back of my head but also because I am who I am because of who you are. So thanks for that.
Love,
Sister Gooch
No comments:
Post a Comment